I found myself having a discussion about the firestorm of presidential race hullabaloo that started when the blonde carrot described his rather bold dating tactics of walking up desirable women and grabbing them by the p…y (kitty cat) to a rather juvenile nephew of a former president backstage on the set of a trashy entertainment show. I commented on the backflips that religious leaders seemed to be taking to downplay and even justify the at best misogynistic, and at worst rapey (my wife’s descriptive that seems completely apropos) words from their chosen candidate of choice.
What. The. Hell.
I don’t know how to process this. If the blonde carrot said he thought my wife was hot and was going to grab her by the kitty cat, I would set aside the abundance of my reserve and put a peephole between his eyes that led to a bay window in the back of his skull. Don’t freak out and call the FBI to report me as having said I’m going to kill the president. I’m using hyperbole here. But, seriously think how you’d feel if a self-entitled, misogynist, douchebag set out to grab your mother, sister, daughter, friend, or family member by their kitty cat. If that doesn’t make you want to reach for your gun, spear, knife, bear spray, karate belt, or the keys to the car with the strongest front bumper in your collection, I question your ability to feel feelings.
As I think back to the females I’ve known fairly well throughout my almost 40 years on this earth (I’m excluding close family here for anonymity purposes. I’m making no statement in favor of or against their experiences.), a shockingly high percentage have been raped at some point in their life. Most have told me that they chose not to report it because they didn’t want to face the shame and social stigma attached to the public fight in court. Let me be clear that when I use the word rape in this instance I’m not referring to groping or childish exploration by young boys nor is it my intent to downplay the severity of those actions. What I am referring to is forced sexual penetration against the expressed wishes of the female victim. Cheeto man’s statements describe how he takes women that he desires sexually. He doesn’t talk about how he woos women that he’d like to get it in.
Guys objectify women in the bro circle all the time. We talk about how we’d like to do whatever with so and so. Not once have I ever said or heard one of the guys in my circles over the years talk about forcing himself on anyone. There’s plenty of big talk around the beer cooler, but talk of forced sexual acts would be strongly opposed by everyone I know. It’s not acceptable in any fashion.
When a person has made it to the final two in the race for president, to be the leader of the free world, and something like this that presents such a clear snapshot into his soul comes out, it makes me take a step back and look at our country and evaluate how we got here. His statement, when distilled down to its base message, shows that he is a rich and powerful man that takes what he wants from anyone no matter who they are or what their wishes are. Voters should take a look at Italy’s Silvio Berlusconi to see how this thing plays out. “It is better to live one day as a lion than 100 years as a sheep,” seems to be their shared motto. It’s mighty unsettling to me that it is a quote from Benito Mussolini, though.
Lord, help us and pass the Scotch…