Paralyzed

On the way home from work one day 10 years or so ago, I decided to pick up a burger for supper, so I drove through the new Dairy Queen and grabbed a cheeseburger value meal with a root beer. I’m a fan of DQ’s cheeseburgers because they’re super cheesy, and they don’t force me to pick off a salad’s worth of soggy vegetables before I take my first bite. (I get all the vegetables I need with the ketchup.) Continue reading

Resolve

Most years around this time, I am laughing under my breath at all the new year’s resolutions that are showing up in Facebook posts about weight loss or spending time with family or some other worthwhile but tired promise that most likely will last about as long as a snowflake in Costa Rica. But, this year, I’m going to break with my tradition, join the crowd, and make a few resolutions of my own. Continue reading

Barbecue isn’t necessarily barbecue

There aren’t many cities, towns, or crossroads in the South that don’t have some sort of purveyor of smoked meats in one form or another selling their wares by the pound or in  three-compartment styrofoam boxes accompanied by sides of baked beans, cole slaw, and a grocery store roll. The range of establishments from which customers purchase their plates of pork range Continue reading

What next?

Well, the election is finally over. Thankfully, Mrs. Clinton conceded gracefully, and we aren’t waiting on counties in south Florida to determine voters’ intent over hanging chads. The democratic process worked for us one more time. There have been protests that are protected by our 1st amendment rights of speech and assembly, but we haven’t had to deal with bloody coups or military uprisings like we saw in Libya at the end of Gadaffi’s rule or in Egypt during the Arab Spring. We’re still living safely in our homes  just like we were Continue reading

I’ve got a beef with steak

Chances are, the way you cook your steak would make me think less of you if you were to tell me your process. I’ve eaten steak prepared a bunch of different ways by a bunch of different folks.  Most of them involved some sort of wet marinade with a haphazard combination of pre-mixed spice blends, individual spices, liquid marinades, Dale’s, and Coke with none of the ingredients being measured. I’d be surprised if the cook could replicate the ingredient list, much less the correct proportion of each ingredient in their super-secret, self- Continue reading

I’m a snob, and here’s why.

I’m sure many others’ lives changed with the culinary awakening caused by the Food Network. We watched Emeril BAM! out the dishes for an hour every night just wishing we could sit near the stage and sample the surely-delicious dishes. We discovered pancetta, prosciutto, shallots, new ways to use grits, what al dente means, and many other Continue reading